My Reality...

Yeah. I'm copying my Princess. I liked her blog post. You can read it here.

1. My bed is only made Friday, Saturday and Sunday. During the week, fuggedaboudit - even if I'm home.

2. I have a hard time creating in my studio when I'm home alone. I gravitate to the computer, and we all know what happens then.

3. If something happens to Charlie Sheen, and 2-1/2 Men goes off the air, I will be seriously heartbroken.

4. However, Lindsay Lohan could drop off the face of the earth and I wouldn't bat an eyelash. Same goes for most of the Housewives, those Kardashian women and all the guests on Maury Povich.

5. In a moment my dryer will buzz, and I will feel resentful.

6. Something that makes me happy to look at: I have a Tigger baseball cap sitting on top of a lampshade in my studio. And a tiara on top of the cap. Not many people can say they have that.

7. I love to clean my bathroom. To me, there is nothing like a clean bathroom, yet the moment it's used for the first time after cleaning, it's ruined completely. Nothing is quite as pristine.

8. My tabs are always open in a specific order. And it must be adhered to.

9. I carry a cup of coffee to all my meetings. I spill my cup of coffee carrying it to all my meetings. Everyone knows when I walk into the room, I require napkins immediately.

10. My dryer is now buzzing and yes, I feel resentful. I think I'll have a cup of coffee before I go fold towels.

Twisted...

Since the weather is SO horrible this winter, I haven't been able to take my walks every day. The park is snowed under, and our streets are in bad shape with ice... and it's FR (that's Phuck Ridiculous) cold and I refuse to walk outside in those conditions.

Or, how about I just tell you the truth and say I'm too spoiled and lazy to go outside in this weather...

SO I came up with the idea that dancing, specifically dancing the Twist, would be a great indoor activity that would help me stay in shape.

I downloaded a few 'twist' songs and burned them. I've been twisting around the house for about a week.

Today I put my cd on and twisted around while I was dusting the house. I made it into the bedroom and started dusting my bureau, which has a large mirror on it.

Can I just tell you how horrifying it is to watch yourself dance? Here I thought I looked just FINE. Yeah. NSM. I may never dance in public again.

That is all.

Tell me it's not just ME...

Our dental supply company has branched out and now has a Techy department. We need new techies. I don't like our current techies. I forgot they were sending out one of those techies to evaluate our computer system and give us a quote on being our new service techies.

He came at 9am. He was a young man. Not techy looking at all. Not bad looking. Not incredible, not UPS hot or anything like that. But presentable. His name was Sean.

The rest of my office came in at 9:30... and patients would be starting at 10:00. At 9:45 or so, Sean disappeared. We checked all over, no Sean. But he left his usb thingamabob stuck in bsgirl's computer.

SO of course we had a field day - "ooh - Sean left his stick in your thing!" "oh no, Sean lost his thingy!" "Inga's got Sean's thingy!!!" and on and on and on...you get the idea.

And we're loud. We're not a quiet bunch. And we're laughing and hooting...

And then I decided to go outside to get the mail. And I opened the back doorway into the hallway...and with my back to the hall I made one more "Sean's stick thingy remark", turned around... and there stood Sean. On his cell.

Of course he heard it all...

Only me. I swear... only me.

Keurig -3; tigger -0

Seriously. I have never had such issues with a machine in my entire life.

First of all, for whatever reason, I can put in the water, I can put in the Pod, but putting the mug under the nozzle? Too much for me, apparently. Perhaps I overload on that 3rd step. And I'm really GOOD at step work. Usually.

I found out how quickly I can move right after using my Keurig for the first time. It was probably the 3rd cup I'd set up, when I heard that gurgle noise, telling me that my wonderful hot cup of coffee was about to squirt out of the nozzle, that I turned around and saw that there was NO mug under said nozzle. I flew across the kitchen, grabbed the first mug I could reach and put it under JUST in the nick of time.

The second time... yeah. That didn't happen. I heard the gurgle. Never turned around. Heard the gurgle end. Went to get my coffee, and there was nothing there. Nothing. No mess, no coffee all over the place - nothing. Now, I KNEW I'd made a cup of coffee. So where was it?

That's when I discovered that the drip tray of the Keurig Mini will hold an entire 10oz cup of coffee. Neatly. No mess. Of course, transferring that same coffee to my mug... that's another story.

And then yesterday arrived... and I was making dinner. I needed to open 2 cans. Did you know that a Keurig Mini will not open a can? Even if you put the can on the drip tray and press down the handle? Nope. Won't open. And I giggled to myself... such a silly tigger. Opened the can correctly with my CAN OPENER, added the contents to my pot. Turned around with the second can, and YES - you guessed it - once again put it IN MY KEURIG and pressed the handle.

If anyone knows the proper removal techniques for a head up an arse, please let me know?

I refuse to let this machine beat me. I am a Brave Girl. I will win.

Eventually.

Hmmmm.... me?

Go get comfy. This might be a long one. In fact, I may go grab a cup of coffee...

I remember when I first stopped drinking I was greatly concerned that I would lose my "ME". That I would lose my creativity, my love of words, my writing ability (what little of it there is) and my love of dirty and gross... This didn't happen. I found that I still loved the same things, and was able to write and talk about them with the same results. My creativity actually increased... and my focus got better.

That was a huge relief to me.

Then came AA. Six months into it, I know I have changed. I'm a work in progress, and that progress is going to take a long time, perhaps a lifetime, but I'm changing on a daily basis.

And once again, some fear crept in that I was going to change and lose my "ME". I could see the difference in my message board posts... and in my status updates and comments on facebook. I watched myself, almost as if I were looking over my shoulder, as I would type things that I never would have thought to type before.

Things like "Adding you to my prayers"; "hit your knees"; "Can I do anything for you?"; "please call me anytime you need someone to talk to"... stuff like that... I found myself becoming a kinder, gentler tigger. One with compassion instead of detachment. And meaning it. Not just typing the words... really meaning it.

I knew the new brave tigger would be welcomed - ascared tiggers can be trying on your nerves. That part of the new me didn't worry me. It was the baudy, naughty, dirty scraples bo, gross 13 year old boy tigger that seemed to be dwindling... and I was honestly ascared of losing her. Even Jeanne was having trouble doing the Font... trying desperately to find a tiggerism in my Dawg posts...

I was worried that I would lose my tiggerness.

So I asked some people that know me best. And their responses were all the same. I haven't disappeared. I'm just MORE ME, rather than LESS ME! And just so nobody is worried, I still love dirty things, and words like balls, boogers or penetration still make me do the :evil6: face, I love wearing my white socks and lighting candles, my scraples bos still make me wiggle in my seat, I still lust after Cyn's son and truly, any hot guy that crosses my path...

I'm still me.

Dusting it off...

Sniffle, SNEEZE!! Wow... the dust is thick in here. I have excuses. Many of them. Ready?

1) This is the first day I've had to myself since the end of October.
2) Need I go on?

Life has been one crazy journey... the most fun, the most heartache, the most ascary.. journey.

To catch things up, (yes - this is a PRE-post - the actual blog post will come AFTER this) AA is going great - life changing in a good way. Learning more about myself each day. Not necessarily liking what I'm learning, but learning how to FIX what I don't like. So that's a good thing.

Work is work. I guess if I didn't have that to bitch about, I'd find something else.

Still loving facebook, the new RHS1975 page is a hoot - and I've reconnected with a lot of nice people. NEVER in a million years would I have expected this - just read back one year - I was NOT going to revisit high school EVER again - and here I am. Loving it.

Creating... still creating. Made a few angels for gifts... 2 of which went over quite well. The other one? Yeah... NSM. But you can't please everyone, right? Gearing up for Soul Restoration, and in 6 months I will be at Brave Girls Camp.

I find that there are only a few instances that my mind quiets... one is while I'm creating something. So I hope to never lose my passion for art...

So, as you can see, I haven't had a lot to blog about - but promise to be here every day this week. Tomorrow's subject - the new ME. AKA Tigger The New and Improved.

I'm sorry... can you spell that?

Time to laugh. I will tell the Beenis story. Ready?

A new patient called to make an appointment for his young son. The man was VERY hard to understand, Asian and I was having a lot of difficulty deciphering what he was trying to tell me.

I was able to finally understand that his son was 3 years old, and he looked in his mouth and thought he saw a cavity.

OK. This I can work with. So I need to get some information in order to put the patient into the computer. And this is where the story unfolds... last name is changed to protect the innocent... lol)

Me: May I have your name please?

Him: WOOO.

Me: Wooo? Double U oh oh oh?

Him: No. WU. Double U U.

Me. Ah. Wu. May I have your son's name please?

(ready? Here's where it gets interesting)

Him: Penis.

Me: ..... nothing. I got nothing. I'm sitting there in stunned silence.

Me: Penis?

Him: Penis.

Me: (trying to hold back laughter) Can you spell that please?

Him: Bee. e. e. n. i. s.

Me: OHHHHH. B. BEENIS???

Him: Yes! Beenis.

So... shaking with laughter, I finish putting ol' Beenis into the computer, and making up a chart. Beenis has become the talk of the office, and we can't WAIT to meet this poor little boy with such a name.

Finally the day comes... and in walks this adorable little 3 year old... and his father hands me all the paperwork on him.

Yeah. It's not Beenis. It's DENNIS. (((sigh))) His chart forever remained Beenis... and my little sock monkey on my desk? I labeled him. He's Beenis.

SOMEBODY had to be Beenis.